Black and white and seeing red all over
At first, having returned to Cape Town after years away, I saw red when I saw all the white faces in restaurants and theatres. Where was the real change so many years after 1994? But then I read...
View ArticleSpag Blog reveals the truth about Malema
Blogs and Twitter have become the hot new breaking ground for news stories, so remember that you read this here first: today, Spag Blog can reveal that there has been an imposter in our political midst...
View ArticleWho turned JZ into Mr Min?
Ok, who turned the world upside down? Who turned the bad guys into the good guys and the good guys into the bad guys? Who turned the ANC into the old Nats and The Arch into PW Botha? Who turned the...
View ArticleStoppie lorrie, my English side wants to get off
Dit my groot lekkerkry gee om hierdie hondeskou oop to verklaar, Meneer Zuma. You’ll be of a certain age and have an elephantine memory to match if you can place the first 80% of that line. It was, I...
View ArticleNaked or naaied — a satirist warns of the cobra under the carpet
Is there a cobra under the South African carpet like the proverbial elephant in the room, defined by Wikipedia as “an obvious truth that is being ignored or goes unaddressed”? Is there a near future in...
View ArticleJust when you thought it was safe to go out at night
Well, there I was, back at the theatre with an open mind and two open eyes, scanning the crowd from the highest vantage point at the Baxter Theatre, when I stopped myself. “Tony,” I said, “You’re...
View ArticleHolding out for the JZ that the dancing, swooning people see
I’m driving through Constantia past impenetrable electrified fences, marvelling at the way some people live and reminding myself that it’s all relative. And there’s an ANC election poster, hanging...
View ArticleMuzzling Nando’s and other stupefying attacks on our freedoms
Muzzling the Nando’s chicken would be funny if it weren’t so serious: the ANC Youth League’s threat to mobilise — get that? — mobilise the people of South Africa to rise up against a manufacturer of...
View ArticleOne day, under President Malema, will we fondly remember the good old Zuma days?
Anyone who is a politician in South Africa; everyone who wants our vote today: you’re a desperately sorry bunch, every one of you. You are, to a man and woman, failing us, the voters of South Africa....
View ArticleHow Malema and you can help me spice up Australian sex lives
I could use Julius Malema’s help here in my battle with some undemocratic types Down Under. Boet, if you’re not doing anything particularly controversial this week or putting your foot in someone’s...
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